Surprise! I haven’t posted a short story in a long time, so I decided to leave you Create Your Deity as a gift. It isn’t your traditional short, as it reads like a press release. While it’s different from anything else I’ve done, I hope this satirical social commentary will resonate with you.
Are you sick and tired of the same old gods and their never-ending rules that dictate how you worship them? Well, CREATE YOUR DEITY™ is set to change the way (and who) you worship with only a few clicks.
For those who’ve begged for a Black Jesus or King Neptune, you can now make this a reality and so much more with this innovative app from the same developers who brought you BIBLE GIFs™.
Speaking about his latest app, CREATE YOUR DEITY™ creator, Lewis Cipher, says, “In this current age, between the stresses of work and a fast-paced lifestyle, we don’t really have time to follow the old practices of religion – and quite frankly, it’s boring, too. So, what we did was to create the ability for you to set the rules of how long, how often, and who you worship. We believe this will be the revolution of religion and make it cool again, because god isn’t dead; he just needed a makeover.”
For only $9.99, you’ll be able to create the type of god that you can relate to. There are at least 100 built-in faces and bodies for you to choose from, as well as 20 personality types ranging from benevolent to authoritarian. Using your phone’s camera or by uploading an image, you can also upload an image of yourself or someone else to use as a template.
In terms of messaging, you can set up whether you want your god to send you text or voice messages, and the frequency of it. There are 10 standard voices available, plus the option to record your own voice or to purchase the Celebrity God pack for $3.99.
CREATE YOUR DEITY™ syncs up to all smartwatches, so you’ll get an instant notification when you haven’t worshipped enough or if you’ve levelled up as a follower. If you’re competitive, you’ll also have the ability to set up a leaderboard with your friends and family to see just who the best follower is.
“In less than five minutes, you can create a god that you want, not the one that your parents told you about and forced you to pray to,” Cipher says. “And now you don’t have an excuse to stray from the path, either, because if you get bored of your god or realise you’re spending too much time with it, change it up and start again.”
So, what are you waiting for? CREATE YOUR DEITY™ is not only the app for the soul, but it’s a whole lot of fun. If you order the app today, you’ll receive the exclusive Dog God pack, which retails for $2.99, absolutely free!